Guksi (kuksa)

My administrative work this afternoon is suddenly interrupted by my own curiosity to what is going on in the room next door... "Look at what Your colleague is forcing me to do!" one of my young adepts 'complains', yet unable to hide his own enthusiasm although he tries his very best...

The smell of newly chopped wood makes me feel as if I'm walking through a forest while I'm getting remarks on my tendency to sneak up with my camera where I'm not supposed to...

"WE WILL SHOW YOU WHEN WE ARE FINISHED! GO AWAY!"

"Okay, guys... I'll be back later..."

Meanwhile, for the beholder to admire, some guksis made by my highly appreciated and truly talented colleague Niclas.

everything's gonna be alright this mornin'

I try to be the sweetest girl ever and what reviews do I get on my attempts! ”Du har STAKE, Anni!” (Swedish for “You’ve got guts” or even “You’ve got COCK”)

No, I do not have a cock and some days not much guts either. The fact is, I wish I was a bit more like that. I have made a decision though, not to run around apologising for being myself anymore.

I was such a tomboy when I grew up. I behaved like a boy and I even looked like one. I was always taller than all my friends. But I was shy. Much more so, than anyone ever noticed or understood. I became an expert on hiding both my potential and my personality. Growing up in Ostrobothnia, Finland, is being closely watched and guarded by the law of Jante – everybody knows it, some of us admit it but not a lot of us fight it.

For most of my life, the greatest question when it comes to challenges - or breaking new ground - has NOT been wether I'm ABLE to do something, but rather if I’m ALLOWED to do it. Admitting to being interested, wanting something or GOD FORBID! even asking for what I want… still does not come easy.

I accidentally stumbled into Muddy Waters on Spotify this morning. “The mannish boy”, so full of himself and yet irresistibly charming. Is it ok for a woman to have a rolemodel like that when it comes to selfconfidence? For a shy tomboy?

It’s not like I would ever become a hoochie coochie man anyway.

La Traviata

Det är inte ofta Vasa Stadsteater har en opera på repertoaren. I går kväll hade jag dock äran att göra en god vän sällskap till en föreställning av "La Traviata" (Tack så oerhört mycket, D!).

En stor opera på en liten scen kräver minsann sitt av sångare, kör och orkester men även om kvalitén på prestationerna stundtals var i ojämnaste laget var framträdandet som helhet en mycket angenäm upplevelse. Med all respekt för primadonnan Anna-Kristiina Kaappola måste jag ändå utnämna Vladimir Dmitruk i rollen som Alfredo till kvällen starkast lysande stjärna. Vilken röst! Lägg namnet på minnet, älskare av klassisk sång. Ge killen några år på nacken, rätt huvudroller och möjlighet att stå på de stora scenerna och vi har snart en tenor av världsklass.

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The City Theatre of Vasa does not often have an opera on their repertoire. However, last night I was fortunate enough to be invited by a good friend to accompany him to a performance of "La Traviata" (Thank You very much, D!).

A major opera on a small stage certainly makes its demands on singers, choir and orchestra, but although the quality of the individual contributions at times varied a bit too much, the performance all in all still was a very pleasant experience. With all due respect to primadonna Anna-Kristiina Kaappola I would still have to appoint Vladimir Dmitruk in the role of Alfredo as the brightest shining star of the evening . What a voice! Take notion of his name, lovers of classical vocal music. Give the guy a few more years, the right leading roles and the opportunity to stand on the major stages, and we will soon have a new world class tenor.

[photos/foton]

the Doomsday Clock

... or "Man is the only creature that knows it's going to die"

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After having had a rough day at work facing all kinds af peculiar phenomenons of mischief and misunderstandings I pick up the paperversion of Hufvudstadsbladet (major fennoswedish newspaper) and stumble into an article on religion and the effects religion has had - still has - on the very specific area where I was brought up. The article is a direct "offspring" from several other articles on the same issue, since a 25-30 year old event including pedophilia was recently brought into daylight within one of the strongest religious alignments of this region. The article in Hufvudstadsbladet twists all my senses and emotions to an extent I'm at first not fully aware of.

During my younger years I worked as a pastor of congregation for a while, ending in burn-out, and I have a tendency to become very sarcastic as soon as any kind of problem arises within religious associations. Always makes me feel like I don't know whether to laugh or cry.

Anyway, as a perfect icing on my somewhat-hard-to-swallow-piece-of-intellectual-cake this afternoon... I find THIS at Pip's (no offense, mate!)

"Continuing tensions with Iran, the bad weather in Europe and especially the earthquake in Haiti will all be taken as 'end times' indicators," Guyatt, a history professor at the University of York, writes in an e-mail. "My guess is that [apocalyptic Christians] would happily move the clock forwards by a couple of minutes. The irony, of course, is that these guys -- unlike the atomic scientists -- are actually rooting for doomsday."

"Scientists seem to be driven by what's going on politically," says the site's founder, Todd Strandberg, who lives in Benton, Ark., calls himself an end-time believer and recalculates the index every Sunday based on man-made, natural and allegedly supernatural phenomena. "I suppose we tend to be the eternal pessimists because the Bible says it's going to get worse. So any time they move [the Doomsday Clock] back, the general reaction is scorn."

Ain't life grand! As long as it lasts, that is.
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vaivun uneen uudelleen

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dreams do not expire

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I've had a great and creative weekend so far, and I finally seem to come to terms with how things have developed around me during the last six months or so. Autumn 2009 surely took it's toll on me and I still have to be somewhat restrictive and careful with issues that tend to get to me in an upsetting way. However, the last couple of days I've felt the creative forces return and it makes me more content alltogether.

Two new songs arranged and documented today, with the assistance of brilliant guitarist Niclas Buss. I'm also working on a new pastel which I'm planning to blog here in a couple of days. There's never any point in waiting for inspiration - it'll come once You've started, and waiting will just allow Your fears to grow. Always remember though:

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Dreams do not expire on a certain date!

unveiled

post scriptum

HAPPY BRAND NEW 2010!

Lady of the Lake...

Facebook provided me with this collage on status updates for 2009. I've had an interesting year, that's for sure! Fate has it that 2010 will be even more interesting and I will live to tell. As long as I'm alive. Stay with me, why don't You now.

I wish all of us fortune and love, blessing in thousands and for the ones of us who need them: a fair amount of challenges too! Happy Brand New 2010!